Red Jet 3, we love thee

The Red Jet 3 is rather unique and exclusive in the Red Funnel fleet in that it is the only vessel with a number 3 in its name, and the only to be built in 1998. 

Last Thursday we decided it was time to visit Southampton to visit Babies’R'Us and the West Quay shopping centres for shopping and shopping related activities along with a baked potato from Fat Jackets and some Lovejuice.  Our favourite lunch and relatively healthy too, nothing beats off a drop of Lovejuice in the morning.

We arrived at the West Cowes Red Jet terminal, skipping and a’jumpin only to find a big crowd including Big Maureen.  Big Maureen is well known on the Isle of Wight for resembling Maureen from Driving School, her loud voice and big body parts make her a joy to see, she is best known for expressions such as “I’m not happy” and “I don’t like that”.  Unfortunately Maureen was remonstrating with the ticket clerkess claiming that on a previous occasion the Red Jet had made her late for an appointment at a beauty salon in Southampton and it better not happen again.  We would ejaculate that her missing her appointment would save her money otherwise wasted but are any of us in a position to judge the credibility of others?

We soon made our way to the front of the queue where we bought our tickets using our Thomas Cook credit card. We do wish they would install a self-attention machine.  Being able to produce a ticket for ourselves would save us in the small talk with personnel who although friendly could be construed as being nosey, asking us about travel plans. 

It was time, as is customary, to make our way up the passageway of excitement to the Red Jet.

It is always exciting to see which craft it is and on this occasion it was Red Jet 3 which is always slightly disappointing as her passenger capacity is lower than Red Jet 4 meaning that people can overhear conversations and restricts the ability to be creative in enjoying your ferry travel.

An eastern European attendant named Armando was on duty to collect the tickets.  He looked rather like BBC Royal Correspondent Nicholas Witchell but unlike Nicholas Witchell we doubt he has ever sat on a lesbian on live TV..

It was time to board the good ship Reddie Jetty Three.

The craft smelt like a Red Jet should smell and the nice racks had large bags sitting on them for passengers eager to deposit their load.

 

Our favourite seats on the craft, at the back where few people sit were taken by Big Maureen whose booming voice announced her displeasure at not being on Red Jet 5 but looked forward to a curry that evening with her taxi driver friend Barbara.  In the end we ended up sitting towards the top end of the ship and the related area.  We tend to prefer the rear end where a bit of fun doesn’t disturb other passengers.

Soon the craft was to make a familiar scene and depart the berth, we enjoyed the safety video.  Of all the safety videos we have enjoyed, we enjoy these most as they remind us of Christmas and visiting Southampton to enjoy the Christmas and Christmas related products on offer.  We are quite sure that ferry enthusiasts would buy DVDs of safety videos.

We did consider ordering refreshments from the onboard bar but decided not to in case it spoilt the taste of our Lovejuice later in the morning.

The ship soon began to pick up speed in the same manner as Kerry Katona returning from leaving her kids at school for the day.

WWAAAAAAAAAAH

We passed Red Eagle…

WOAAGGGHHHHHHH

We passed Red Osprey….

WANGGGGGGGGO000

We passed Red Falcon

We sank into our comfortable leather seats with a feel for luxury like a luxury cruise liner and related facilities.

Even the carpet feels deep, plush and exciting, rather like a rocket exploding on a black background..

Having once spent an entire crossing staring at the ceiling of the Red Jet 1, it was nice to remind ourselves of the attractive non-woodchip related ceiling

We departed the ferry at Southampton, with a tear in the eye like leaving a special one, for that is what Red Jet 3 is, a special one.  Such a happy crossing had been had with the sun shining, a good buzz along the water and the thought of shopping and lunch ahead.  If everyday was like this, one would become a cumuter living our lives in the red jet way, everyday, everyweek, every month, every year.

We do recommend the red Jet 3, go do a trip on her before you become too frail to do so.

Open your minds and sample the fun of a Red Jet.  They are unique in the ferry world and well worth developing a marriage of ferry affection.